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  • Writer's pictureSophisticated Weddings


A common regret of married couples that have planned a wedding- brides in particular- is that they let the stress overshadow the journey. Planning a wedding is stressful, but it doesn’t have to be. The engagement phase of your relationship should be one of joy and celebrations. If you’re feeling overwhelmed and overextended in preparation for the happiest day of your life, then you’re defeating the purpose. Stay calm and enjoy on.

Call In The Pros. A good wedding planner is like a best friend, location scout, second set of eyes, advocate, mediator, accountant, wedding encyclopedia, proactive do-er, and creative genius all wrapped up in one wonderful person. Their job is to make your life easier, and to not let you down. If only they could continue on to be your life coach post-wedding, you’d be set for eternity.

Here’s why you need a planner: You have a life, a job, a family, a fiancé, and now a wedding to plan. Planning a wedding is a major undertaking; quite frankly, it can be a full-time job. Although the work that leads up to the wedding is planned with fun and enjoyment in mind, the tasks to get you there aren’t always reflective of this. It can be burdensome and tedious at times. New York Wedding Planner Danielle Bobish of Curtain Up Eventslists 31 services she provides to brides alone. The funny thing is, we dare to suggest she’s just being modest.

A planner, or even a day-of coordinator, can be the sole factor that defines a wedding as either stressful or enjoyable. “I have found that listening to my clients needs is enough to put them at ease,” says Yohaidy Pichardo ofBetty’s Total Events. “We offer solutions to problems that the client may not have ever taken into consideration, big or small.”

Riki & George’s Cipriani 42nd Street Wedding; Photo By Brett Matthews Photography

Don’t DIY! Now hear us out. Would you build your own house from scratch with your bare two hands? Unless you’re a contractor, no, probably not. While this may sound like a dramatic or even askew analogy, consider all that you’re about to embark upon. Maybe you work fifty hours per week at your job, and you’re planning a wedding for two hundred people. 60 of them are coming in from out of town, and will require overnight accommodations, and welcome bags. You need to negotiate the number of tables you will have, so you can order your linens in a shade called indigo petunia, and inform the florist of the number and sizes of your centerpieces. But wait- how do you know how many RSVPs to expect? And where are those invitations anyway? Weren’t they supposed to be printed by last week? Your sister keeps trying to change the bridesmaid dresses, and we shouldn’t even get you started on which of your parents’ friends are invited to the rehearsal dinner. You have no idea if you’ve even had your friend properly ordained to legally marry you, and you’re starting to think it’s the least of your worries. Now your fiancé is seeing you have a meltdown that not even a Bravo reality show would air, and you’re not married yet. Is now the time to make 200 of those cute little chalkboard coasters that say “M + D Forever” in a heart with a chalk paint pen? Not unless you’re looking to host arts and crafts hour at Bellevue. What if you only had to focus on the fun stuff? Are you a crafty person that loves DIY projects? With a planner, you can find the time (and sanity) to do it. If you just love the look, but the idea of using a glue gun is daunting, the planner can help you turn your vision into a reality. There are plenty of opportunities to incorporate your personal touches into your wedding day, but it doesn’t mean you have to give yourself a chronic ulcer to achieve it. Enjoy your wedding. Don’t despite it.

Marci & Daniel’s Wedding At TriBeCa Rooftop; Photographed By Brett Matthews Photography

Accept that Things Go Wrong. Sometimes bad things happen to good people. Whether it’s hurricane damage to a venue, a vendor that has gone bankrupt after they’ve accepted your deposit, a contract that isn’t being honored, or just a rainy day, these things can and do happen. With a planner, you have a solid support system in your corner. Should your wedding need to be relocated at the last minute, and you don’t even know where to begin, your wedding planner is suddenly promoted to wedding hero. They know just what to do when things go wrong, and better yet, in most cases, prevent those very situations from happening in the first place. Whereas you’re new to this wedding planning venture, your planner is not. They’ve done and seen it all, and they know the players of their game. They consider your individual needs, taste, and personality, to recommend vendors that are reliable and complement your vision. Not only can they help to stay on budget, they’ll also see that the terms of all of your agreements are honored and your interests are protected. For vendors, when you have a wedding planner, they’re not just seeing your wedding as a one-time business stint, but rather an opportunity to be recommended again and again. If a vendor doesn’t do right by you on your wedding day and you have a planner in your corner, that’s called career suicide. They’ll never get away with it, and they know it. As for the elements beyond their control, there’s no one better to get you the nicest collection of umbrellas you’ve ever seen on whim, if it turns out to be a rainy day. “One time,” José Rolón of José Rolón Events tell us, “The back top hook of my bride’s wedding dress snapped off 15 minutes before the ceremony was to begin. It was nowhere to be found. I noticed that the photographer had a see-through blouse that happened to have one on the inside, so with her permission, I popped that sucker right off, and we sewed that bad boy on the dress so she could walk down the aisle right on time and in style!” A wedding planner is not unlike a superhero, and every bride and groom deserves their perfect day.

Melanie & Eric’s Wedding At Liberty Warehouse; Photographed By Brett Matthews Photography

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